Thursday, January 20, 2011

wash your own brain

Master the insanity of denial and accept truth for a while. Four times the typical dose and my usual coast of thought is settled to a steady spot. I never knew it could feel so good to be alive, am I high? Hmph. No. Addiction has never controlled me but we've had some wild dances. Risque, to say the least. Most certainly, it was done with a chic approach to a lavish life of pamper. Most certainly, it is a past of mine. It was fun but I was freightened by what could become from a continnumm of self neglect. I can't kid myself, I have too much respect.

It's sacrifice makes strength for a cherised time, the pain is like hiking... the reward is like peaking a mountain of knowledge. Amazing. The review mirror is not worth a glance, there is such a greater future to seize. I'm embracing every breath like a flower in photosynthesis. Sensitivity is the depth to my existence... nothing is better understood than that you can feel. Emotion may be a heavy weight but I've always been so strong. I'm proud, brave, and real as fuck. I have grown to become the fuel to the fire I was once watching, admiring. The brain is emmensely powerful... you can psyche yourself into anything. This a new day, a new me. I'm a retired gangsta. This is me and everything I have to offer as I ditch the party life I once swam in daily. This is my creative, insane, ideological mind. I'm out on a limb but the breeze feels good.

I know the image I've drawn for some folks is not one they could have anticipated. For some reason, I had to prove I was a badass. For the sake of love, forget presumptions to hear what thunder bolted me straight. I feel like Benjamin Franklin discovering electricity, An oddball. But diverse actions create diverse reactions, sometimes beneficial. Do you like that electricity keeping you warm and lighting your screen? I believe you are in lust with your electricity, it is absolutely orgasmic. Would you like new innovation? Embrace diversity.

It is a beautiful life, appreciate. Discrimination is gross. You can choose to accept me, you can choose to be scared. It is ultimately your opinion that matters most for a relationship to be sincere between you and I. If you can't handle me at my BEST, you don't deserve me at my WORST... because I'm very vulnerable at my worst, and very intimidating/distracting at my best. I will always have open arms, an open shoulder for anyone with good nature to bare. I will not be fooled by illusion because I create my own illusion with the beauty of your soul. I don't judge based on appearance. I never have and never will. Don't change me. This is the most true me, my favorite way to live. Im refreshed for once in 21 years. I can help anyone that would like to understand tough and bizarre behavior. I am a tough and bizarre person myself. And I make one promise- I will give you the bigger half of my foot long if I see a friend without food to eat. I consider myself a tree hugger, a poet, an artist, a gangsta, an honor roll student, and everything in between... I can do it all.



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